The letter she left
by xEmmaChanx
Summary: Its about Hikaru and how Haruhi left him with a letter, he wished she never wrote they are much older though! . This is my first fanfiction, so sorry if its really crap! lol enjoy though.
1. Chapter 1

I just wanted to say I dont own Ouran high school host club! GOD I WISH I DID!

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I'm finished. I'm done. I give up . Is that what you wanted to hear for long? Is that what you've been just dying to hear from me? That I can't do this anymore? And don't act surprised. Open up your eyes. Anyone could have seen this coming. All you did was hurt me. Every time I did something nice you threw it back in my face. Was I only good for a roll in the hay? That's how you seemed to treat me. I initiated everything in our relationship just shy of sex. That was your domain, and guess what? You can have it. You can have that satisfaction.

Do you realize how I felt? Do you? I never wanted to give up like this, I wanted to work this out. I really wanted to. But no, I would try to talk to you about it, and you were all over me. Maybe if you had given me the time of day, the moment to make my peace, we could have worked something out. We could have made this work. But obviously, you didn't want that as badly as I did. Not even a little bit. I wanted it, so badly, to work. I wanted to maintain a stable relationship, I really, truly did, but you just didn't.

Did you know Kaoru warned me in the beginning? Yeah. He did. Your darling twin brother warned me from day one, to be careful. He knew you were jealous, he knew how you were when you got angry. And I was a fool. I didn't listen. Not for one damn second. I took everything in stride. Every scathing word said to me, every gift considered not good enough, every single thing that made me feel like I wasn't good enough for you. That I was inferior; that I wasn't good enough.

I love you so damn much, Hikaru Hitachiin, and you throw it all back in my face.

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I stared at the letter, feeling the color drain my face, my throat burn, my eyes begin to water. I didn t hurt her, I know I didn t. She was such a such a damn attention whore. That was it. This wasn t my fault, I would rationalize it that way. How could she draw such conclusions? I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, climbing gingerly from the bed to make my search through our apartment. Already I noticed things missing: the scarf she had hung over the mirror at the dresser, her laptop, her antique jewelry box.

I crossed the room quietly, the pricking in my eyes and the burn in my throat growing worse with every step. She had moved them, I reasoned. Placed them elsewhere, perhaps in the bathroom. I walked to the bathroom, bypassing her closet and her drawers in the dresser. I stepped into the warmly colored room. It still smelled of us: my cologne, her perfume, my body gel, her hair products. It still smelled of her in all the right ways. I could smell her perfume and hair spray, the scent fading ever so slightly. It was my favorite perfume too. I never did tell her that.

It smelled like green apple candy.

I opened the door to the cabinet above the toilet. Her things were gone. All of them. Her perfumes, ribbons, bows, hair clips, bobby pins, hair sprays, brushes. Everything. I looked under the sink. Her blow dryer and flat iron were gone too. I opened the medicine cabinet; those ridiculous Band-Aids she kept around were gone, Batman and Avatar, I recalled. She had put one on my finger when I sliced it open cutting avocadoes a few months back. My eyes flicked down the pinkish scar on my pointer finger.

I padded near-silently out of the room, stopping and opening one of her drawers. Her shirts were gone, every last one. I walked across again and opened her closet. Everything was gone. My mind s eyes flashed over every last outfit she had worn and settled on one she frequently wore for her internship. Black dress pants, stiletto boots, that tight, kind of shiny purple shirt with the diamond buttons the outfit had been a present from me. I loved it. Something else I never told her.

I love you. How many times had she said that and I never said anything back? How many times did I utter under my breath a Yeah or a Sure, whatever ? Was I that ungrateful? The burn in my throat got worse at that thought. She was right, really. I did throw everything back in her face. Did I really make her feel like she didn t deserve me? She had it wrong. So wrong. This sounds like a damn soap opera. She would be laughing at me right now.

I left the bedroom quietly, still in my pajama pants. It felt strange. I knew when I woke up. Normally she woke me up when she was leaving for school, so I could begin to get ready for my classes. Today, the alarm clock had woken me up. My alarm clock. It hadn t woken me up in almost two years. A grimace swept across my face. I entered the kitchen and looked around. She had made breakfast before leaving. It still smelled like eggs and bacon. My stomach would have normally rumbled in response to this smell but no. She was gone, it remained silent.

I rounded the corner of the bar and frowned, the ferris wheel like picture frame thing she had liked so much was gone, the pictures of us left behind. I picked them up, my finger running gently across her face in one. A candid shot she had always liked. Renge had taken it when we went to the beach. It was black and white. She was leaning over me, smiling and pointing at a baby turtle scuttling towards the water. A genuine smile had lit up my face. She was perfect. I never told her that.

I flicked through the photos and smiled at each one in turn. I stopped. There was one I hadn t seen before. It was at the party. I smiled wryly at the happy picture. She was crying big, happy tears. I was there, sliding a white gold and diamond ring on her finger. She had wanted to go traditional American, so I did, for her. Probably the only nice thing I d ever done for her. I snorted and set down the picture. I wonder if this was a test? We were engaged. There was no way she would just leave like that.

The living room was the worst part. The pictures of her family and friends were gone, her personal touch was absent. Her personal touch was absent throughout the entire condo. My heart broke when I walked in. I felt the tears fall, and I made no noise. There was a folded up wad of money with her ring and cell phone on top of it. I fell onto the couch and my head fell between my knees. She had really left me. I had done it, exactly what everyone had always warned me about. That my callous behavior would push her away. Possibly forever. It seemed that had happened.

Her cell phone buzzed quietly, her ring tone starting up quietly. I listened to the song and smiled sadly. I should have known it would pertain to me. You took my heart, deceived me right from the start-- I glanced at the caller ID. Kaoru why is he calling her now? I flipped open the phone and hit the green button. Hello, kaoru why are you calling her at this time ?

So she actually left? My eyes narrowed. How did Kaoru Knew?

You knew? I heard him snort on the other end. I didn't think she would actually do it. I didn't think for a half of a second she would leave. I hit end and shut the phone. She had been telling Kaoru she was leaving?

I missed her so much.

* * *

I flung open the door to Kaoru's apartment and stormed into his living room. He looked up at me calmly and shut his book, standing to face me. What happened to knocking?

I've never knocked. He shrugged and stared at me on the other side of his living room. So, what did you come here for Hikaru? He knew damn good and well.

You told her to leave me didn't you? He laughed. He actually laughed at what I said. You think I had that kind of influence over her? You knew her even less than I had thought. He snorted and smiled miserably at me. She told me the other day she was leaving. I didn't think she would. As much as you hurt her, and pissed her off, she loved you. She probably loved you more than anyone has ever loved someone. And you hurt her so bad.

Do you know how low Haruhi's self-esteem was? Hearing her name hurt. It killed me, ripping my heart into shreds and stomping on it. You put her down so much and she still came back to you. She came to me crying a lot. She went to Uta and Tamaki, too. She cried so damn much. Haruhi was hurt so much because of you. Because all she ever did was try to make you happy. And what do you do? He shook his head in disgust and turned away from me, disappearing into his kitchen. I watched Kaoru leave for a moment and then turned, exiting Kaoru's home. I picked up my cell phone from my pocket and climbed into my car.

Tamaki answered on the third ring. Where is she?

Who?

Haruhi, you idiot. He sucked in a breath at my words.

I'm not telling you. You'll hurt her more.

please Tamaki, I need to no where she is, I can't live without her Tamaki sighed down the phone.

I would if I could Hikaru but I promised Haruhi, beacuse there is another reason why... I have to go. Uta's here. "wait what do you mean another reason what is it?He hung up on me. I frowned and hit another number on the speed dial. Kyoya answered halfway through the first ring. Where is she, Kyoya?

I would tell you if it wouldn't hurt her. He hung up after that. My hand gripped the steering wheel tighter. I hit one more number. Hunny answered shortly after I called. I stopped counting rings. I'm not telling you. I don't know where she is.

He stayed on the line. Hunny what have I done?

He was quiet for all of a minute. I don't know. But whatever you did, it was the wrong thing. He said a quick goodbye and then hung up. I slowed to a stop and climbed out of the car, walking to the front door of the condo we had shared. I couldn't think her name. My phone buzzed and I looked at the ID on the front. Renge was calling me. I hit a button on the side and the call was ignored. My phone buzzed once to let me know I had a missed call. It buzzed again a minute later, as I was taking off my shoes, to say that she had left a voicemail.

I sat down in the living room and bent forward again, my head between my knees. The tears started back up. I watched them hit the dark wood floor. Is this how she had felt so many times? Is this the pain she had so often felt? Is the pain she felt because of me? God, I was a horrible person.

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so what do you think? I hope you liked it! The second chapter will be coming out soon, but I would like to have my friends opinions first through! hehe love you my darlings this is for you guys and you know who you are! xx


	2. Chapter 2

The Letter she left chapter 2!

Heya peoples this is chapter 2 of The letter she left! Hopefully you liked my first chapter, hehe, OH my character I created is called Uta Magumi (Tamaki's fiance) and i'm going to tell you what she looks like, she has emerald eyes, long (hip length hair) dark chocolate brown hair and a stunning figure, lovely personalty and super tough too! Looks like a goddess in my imagination! ENJOY CUPCAKES!

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'please leave a message after the beep.'

.....BEEP.....

'Hi Hikaru, it's Renge speaking, listen Hikaru, I...I know what you were doing to haruhi is heartbreaking but what she is hiding from you is totally not fair and I think if you truly love her, I think you should see her, not for your sake or her's but for the.....well you'll find out if you get hold of her! Take care Hikaru and don't do anything stupid! you got that, bye.'

beep....beep.................beep

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In a massive mansion (more like a castle) on the borderline of Tokyo. A couple are discussing what to do about their friends problems.

Uta (Tamaki's soon to be wife) is pacing around their royal-like bedroom wondering if telling Hikaru, what Haruhi is hiding from him is right to keep from him? "mmmmm....Tamaki, I don't think what Haruhi is doing is right, maybe we should tell Hikaru and everything might go back to normal, their relationship might turn back to normal too! Both of them knowing how much they love each other...but I don't think Hikaru knows how much Haruhi truly means to him!"

After finishing her little speech she sits on his lap and snuggles her head under his chin. "We have known those two for so long and I hate seeing my best friend (thats haruhi btw, lol) and also my other good friend suffering!" "I know, I hate seeing them suffer too! Especially my precious daughter suffer the most!" Whilst Tamaki said that he looks down to see his fianace looking rather annoyed 'I'm joking, It was surpose to cheer you up, hehe' with a teardrop behind his head thinking 'wow, she really doesn't like me calling Haruhi my precious daughter?' He Looks down to see his loved one stare into outerspace a, so make her thinking about their friends' situation he asks his Queen "Why don't you like me calling Haruhi 'my precious daughter' ?" She looks up to him with a hint of shock and embrassment in her goddess-like face " *sigh* do I have to?" Tamaki nodds whilst doing his adorable and cute puppy dog eyes, which helps him get away with anything! "well, ok, to tell you the truth, I don't mind you calling her that but if you keep calling her that...then what if we have a daughter? Would Haruhi still be your 'precious daughter' still?"

Tamaki, never thought of that! What would Haruhi be, if he had his OWN daughter? When he thought of this he had a enchanting image of his own real daughter and what would she be like? Thinking about this Tamaki has a tiny blush "well..*cough* mmm, I never thought about that?....... b-but anyway going back to Haruhi and Hikaru's situation, maybe what Haruhi is doing is a good thing! He is irresponable. Plus Haruhi is a grown up woman, she can probably do this without Hikaru after all!"

"But...but, I know, what i'm going to say might sound like i'm on Hikaru's side, even though, he shouldn't of been a jerk to her in the first place. I...I just don't think it's right, How would you feel, if I had kept something this big, a secret from you and never told you or have a say about it, hmmm? She looked into his big violet eyes that always showed hope in their special life with him and just maybe he might understand her point she is trying to prove to him. Well bascially doing her version of puppy dog eyes.

Tamaki notices this blushes and what do you expect him to do, he scrurries over to his little corner in the bedroom with a depressing atmosphere around him sniffling "Why is that she is always right?"

Uta walks over to her beautifully framed window sighing to herself and stares at the marvelous view. A tiny little crystal teardrop runs down her soft, fragile face. Tamaki noticing this walks behind his goddess and turns her around to see her face, seeing that tiny, teardrop shaped pearl on her face and doing so kisses it away and embraces her saying "don't worry, everything will be ok" she pushes him away a little bit and starts shout and panic "NO it won't, why can't things go back to the way they used to be in high school? Instead of seeing everyone arguing and dissagreeing with each other! I want to see everyone smile like they used to!" When Uta finished saying this she broke into tears which stained Tamaki's expensive shirt that came all the way from london. (sorry I just wanted to add the london shirt thing in! LOL!)

Even though what Tamaki was going to say might hurt his Queen even more, he just had to say it "same here, Uta, I wish for the same...but" as he does so he lifts her head, and gently cups her cheek and says "It's not up to us, we just have to hope that Haruhi leaving Hikaru puts some commonsence into him and he will go rushing back to her! I have an idea! Why dont you talk to Haruhi and tell her what you have been telling me this whole time? I'll get your cell phone ok?" Uta looks at the floor and nods her head a little. "Ok, I'll talk to haruhi" she looks up at her King's face and gives hima warm smile and as she does she plants a kiss on his royal lips .

* * *

ring.......ring.....ring....ring..

'Hello Renge speaking, may I ask who is speaking?'

'Heya Renge, it's me Hikaru.'

'...Oh Hikaru..HI...mmm did you get my voice message?'

'yeah..I did and I think your right! I hurt her back and treated her like a piece of shit, i'm going to get her back! Even if it costs my life or a million yen, i'm going after her and tell her what I should of told her all these times we have been together!'

'...Hikaru..'

'Yeah Renge?'

'I'm in'

'What? I don't understand?'

'I'M GOING TO HELP YOU GET HARUHI BACK YOU IDIOT! Now this is what we are going to do...'

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heya chapter 2 finished and complete! i'm so sorry if its crap! w but hopefully you liked it! I would also like to thank my very good friend Rom for helping me go through it and adding the Tamaki corner of wo in it 2! hehe, no flames please!


	3. Chapter 3

wow, i havent updated this story in ages! well here's chapter 3! ^.^

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6 years later

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The sun was shining in the busy city of tokyo and in a lovely cafe, with flowers decorated all around it looking a lot like a English Tea House, that smells of sweet dough and sugar, is a beauty that any man wishes to have, with long, flowing brown hair that looks like melted chocolate and big emerald,green eyes that brights up every room. What this mysterious beauty was doing was waiting for a close friend of hers to meet her at this cute cafe that she enjoys eating at.

With laughing and chatting in the background, the woman was focusing on her water that she ordered. Hearing the little bell on the cafe door ringing, the beauty looks up to see if that was her companion she has been waiting for!

A woman with similar coloured hair but at a much shorter length walks in the door, with Huge brown eyes and rushing up to the beautiful maiden, is two twin girls with shoulder, reddie-orange length hair and matching eyes like their mother.

'Auntie Uta!'

'Yorika, Yoriko..my favourite girls!'

With arms open wide, the woman tightly hugs the red haired twins. Finishing her hug with the twins she walks over to the twins mother and gives her a hug too.

'Haruhi how are you?'

'I'm very good, come sit..do you want anything to drink or eat my treat!' Wiggling her perfect eyebrows, her friend laughs and replys,

'No thank you Uta, girls do you want anything to drink or eat?'

'No thanks Mommy.' Haruhi's daughter Yorika says

'Yes please, can I have a strawberry milkshake?' the other daughter Yoriko replys, as Haruhi lifts Yorika onto the chair she grabs hold of Yoriko and does the same with her after placing her on the chair she kisses her on the cheek.

'Sure thing, coming right up.'

Uta, seeing the motherly care gives a little sigh and walks over to Haruhi who has just walked over to the counter to order her drinks.

'That will be 677.03 yen ( 5.75 in pounds) please.'

As Haruhi was about to pay for her drink her friend rushes in and places her credit card in front of the cashier, about to protest, Uta butts in.

'I said my treat, which means im paying!'

' *sighing* fine, anyway tell my about your honeymoon Uta, didn't you go to Rome?'

'Oh Haruhi it was lovely, but we didnt just go to Rome, no Tamaki had to be more romantic and take me to london, barcerlona, Paris , New York and Hawii, it was amazing we have so many pictures, and did so many things..Oh I also have many gifts as well, for you and the girls!'

As Uta finished her little speech on the places she and her now prounced Husband went on their honeymoon, the cashier gives the ordered drinks to Haruhi and Uta, but the cashier's face changes and becomes shocked.

'A-aren't you Uta Suou, the famous model and singer!'

With a pretty smile gracing her face, she gives the cashier a nod and a little wink and walks off with Haruhi to the girls. Sitting down and giving Yoriko her milkshake, she begins to start a conversation with the newly wedded woman.

'Wow, so many places, what would you say was your favourite place then?'

Having a sip of her green tea, Haruhi looks up to the famous model, who was finding it hard to decide her favourite place she went for her honeymoon, by tapping an elegant finger on her perfect chin.

'I loved all the places we went..mmm, but I think Paris would have to be my favourite part of the honeymoon!'

'Why Auntie Uta?'

The daughter known a Yorika asked with big, brown, doe like eyes looking up to meet a pair of emerald.

'Why you ask Yorika...mmm I think its because it was a beautiful city and many amazing shops..Oh and disneyland was lots of fun too!'

'Woooowwww!'

Both the twins say in sink as the woman they call Auntie, says about going to Disneyland.

'But I think another good part was seeing our old friend Hikaru again..'

Eyes of both brown and green widen as that name is mention. With regret in her dazzling eyes, Uta looks back up to Haruhi.

'Sorry it just slipped out, I should of not said his name.'

'No, its fine...how is he..?'

Haruhi stared into the cup that was half full of green liquid, Uta looking over to her friend shows sorrow on her face. swollowing hard Uta replys.

'He's doing well...mmm, Haruhi he's..mmm, getting married!'

Now Haruhi was in shock, the twins, yorika and yoriko, looked at the two older women in wonder and confusion at the conversation they were having.

'I thought I should tell you as soon as possible but I only thought Tamaki and I were going to Rome, and also I thought you would be ok with it since you didnt want to be with him anymore and I dont think he would of been single forever...but he's coming back to Japan soon to come and celebrate with Tamaki and me!'

Looking up to her friend with a small and also fake smile, places itself on Haruhi's face and she replys back.

'I can understand that he would find other women in his life...I just hope he's not treating her like he treated me when we were together...wait, celebrating what with you and Tamaki?'

As worry and discomfort left her face, Uta smiled back to her friend.

'Well thats why I wanted to talk to you...Haruhi..Tamaki and I..we're going to have a baby!'

Hearing those words coming from her friends mouth, Haruhi went into shocked mode again.

'Wow, Uta..congratulations!'

leaning over to give her friend a congratulation hug. The women and children talked, ate and drinked for hours about everything that has happened over the past month.

* * *

flashback

In a quiet apartement, where you can hear the sound of rain coming from outside. A young woman stared out the window.

'I hope there isn't any thunder...'

Disrupting the quiet and peaceful apartement, there was a loud knocking noise at the door.

BANG...BANG...BANG

'HARUHI...OPEN UP IT'S HIKARU...'

But all what the young woman did was stare through the window, as if she hadnt heard anything.

BANG...BANG...BANG

'HARUHI, PLEASE I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU!'

BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...BANG...

Having enough of the banging on her door, that was starting to give Haruhi a headache, she opened the door with such agression that the door might of been ripped off.

'WHAT...WHAT DO YOU WANT HIKARU?'

Standing in the doorway, out of breathe and with a few raindrops falling from his reddie hair.

'Can I come in I want to talk to you!'

Stepping a side, Hikaru walks in and looks around the apartement, it smelled like her...it gave him peace.

'What do you want to talk about? You made such a commotion..well TALK!'

Turning around to look at her...she had changed so much since they were in High school, Her hair wasnt short it was down to her shoulder and she had more curves on her small body.

'Renge told me in the end, why you truly left..'

Haruhi's eyes widen at what Hikaru just said, but she calmed herself and looked him dead in the eyes.

'Really, well I dont care-'

cutting her off short, Hikaru started to shout.

'WELL I DO! YOUR CARRYING MY CHILD, THAT WAS NO REASON FOR YOU TO LEAVE ME! WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!'

After shouting Hikaru storms over to Haruhi and grips her by her shoulders.

'I want to be with you, I love you..a-and I know this is big but I think I can to do this so please can we talk about this...I mean you dont want to do this by yourself!'

Taking a deep breathe, Haruhi looks down, too afraid to look at Hikaru face for what she is about to say.

'There is no baby..'

Dumb-folded Hikaru's eyes widen like saucers, dropping his arms by his side he replys back to the statement that Haruhi has told him.

'w-what?'

Teardrops fell from hazel, brown eyes that landed on the soft rug that was under the agruing ex-couple.

'I said the is no baby, I didnt want it, like I dont want you..'

Hikaru still in shock, bawls his hand into fists and with a pained expression, stands there shaking. Haruhi starts to shake herself and hugs herself to help stop the shaking.

'well then...you have made your mind up then...I'll leave you then, I'll go far away from you if that's what you want! My business has transferred to Paris anyway so i'll be going there...I hope you have a good life Haruhi Fujioka..'

Walking passed Haruhi he goes to the door and gently shuts it, until it clicks...still hearing the faint sound of his footsteps, Haruhi waits until she couldnt hear the sound of shoes hitting the floor, when she knew he wasn't there anymore, she fell to the floor, tears uncontrollable falling down her pretty face and splashing on the cream rug, screaming.

'Why...why did I say that too him...'

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hope ya liked it! ^.^


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